Flaming Duck Presents: Yukinaton 80 InuYasha style
by Flaming Duck
Summary: What do you think would happen when The InuYasha gang attend an anime convention? What panel would they sit in on? What happens when InuYasha and Jakotsu both attempt to write a lemon? Chapter 1 Up! Rating will go up next chapter!


Note: Before you start this fic, it is recommended that you read our other fic "Demon Sex Education." Though it is not required for your enjoyment, you will not understand a few references and one section in particular if you have not read it. Just a heads up. Also, there are references to a few other anime in this fic as well as a few cameos from other series characters. Try to catch them. It could be a game! YAY! And don't worry! If you don't get something you can always read the notes or glossary of terms at the end of the chapters. Arigato and we hope you enjoy!

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Neechan #1 and Neechan #2 casually stroll to the front of a large hall and flop their extremely large and paper-filled bags onto the top of a long conference table. They are both wearing matching black slacks and large forest green sweatshirts that read Flaming Duck' in white. Neechan #1 sighs and slumps into the nearest chair. Neechan #2 starts to unpack her bag, covering the table with small stacks of paper.

"Why are you doing that already? Relax. The group won't be here for a while." Neechan #1 shifts uncomfortably against cold metal.

"A while? They'll be here in 10 minutes!"

"Yeah, that's a while."

"Baka."

"Yup."

Neechan #2 sighs and proceeds to make sure the right amount of fold-up chairs are in the room.

"Ne, Ne, Neechan #2, don't you think we should have some sort of real names in this fic, since we're doing the evil self-insertion thing? I mean, the Neechan thing is fun and all, that's who we are, but it could get confusing."

"Agreed, shall we choose?"

"I wanna be Ayaka!" Neechan #1 screams, holding one arm up in the air as if betting at an auction for a Sesshoumaru plushie for Neechan #2.

"I shall be…" Neechan #2 ponders her name choice while Neechan #1, I mean, Ayaka, gets into her obsessive compulsive mode, jumping from her chair and not only checking the seating arrangements but also making sure the chairs are in perfect symmetrical rows.

"I will be Setashi Korvonisky Morris Vanguard Tervintry IV."

Neechan #1 strares at her with a blank expression.

"Tashi for short."

"Yosh! That works, Tashi-chan!" Ayaka screams as she gets out the nametags and black markers. "Two minutes, wow, time flies when you're getting ready to torture poor souls."

"Hai," a small grin spreads across Tashi's face as she takes a seat behind the desk, "Shall we begin?"

Ayake nods in response, collapsing into a chair, as if from exhaustion, next to her friend. "Hajime!"  
  
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Hundreds of people covered the halls of the Yukinaton Convention center, seeking different items and rooms. It was a convention for those who enjoy watching the great gifts brought to us from Japan in animated form, in common terminology, anime geeks. As Bankotsu reluctantly made his way through the crowd, he couldn't help but stare.

He mumbled under his breath as a man in a Faye costume sauntered by. "Man, and I thought Jakotsu was fruity."

"I heard that," Jakotsu called back, half screaming over the rabid fangirls that had circled a group in front of their path.

"That's just perfect. We have to get through there right?" Bankotsu sighed. Why was he here anyway? He wasn't into this shit.

"Yup, don't worry, it won't be a pr-" Jakotsu stopped mid sentence to emit a high-pitched squeal that only animals would not fear. A pair of silver ears were towering over the swarm of girls. Bankotsu knew those ears from anywhere and so did Jakotsu.

"INU-CHAN!" Jakotsu launched himself into the fray before Bankotsu could restrain his hyperactive friend. InuYasha couldn't prepare himself for the impact; he didn't realize that the man was flying at him until too late. The girls screamed, InuYasha turned, and Jakotsu pounced.

"Itai!" InuYasha reached to rub his aching forehead as he struggled to regain his bearings, but found he couldn't move his arms. Something was on top of him on the linoleum floor. Something big, no, someone was clinging to his aching form, arms wrapped around his sides in a tight embrace, restricting his movement. InuYasha struggled to open his eyes but found it difficult due to the pain radiating through his temples. He silently cursed the person on top of him who was now attempting to nuzzle his way into his chest. Who was this damn person and why did they have to move their knee across his crotch like that? InuYasha blushed as a thought came to mind, "Could it be…Kagome?" He quickly disregarded the idea. Why would Kagome jump him when she could say osuwari' and get him on the ground that way?

Twitch.

InuYasha was torn from his thoughts by a motion of the other person. Could that be a hand? No, both hands were around his sides. Which meant… _Twitch_.

InuYasha's eyes flew open, disregarding the pain as an after thought and looked down to see a happy-go-lucky Jakotsu.

"AHHH!!!" Jakotsu was in the air once again, this time thrown into Bankotsu who carelessly dropped him onto the floor.

"Wha…wha, what was that?!" InuYasha cheeks were flushed as he backed away from Jakotsu, running into many giggling girls in the process.

Jakotsu lifted himself to the ground and started towards the hanyou once again, only this time walking. The glint in his eyes forced InuYasha's feet to pick up the pace.

"Holy shit," Bankotsu laughed, "You fucking liked it."

"I DID NOT!" A mortified InuYasha stumbled as he turned his back for the first time since he saw Jakotsu's face and bolted down the crowded hallway, jumping over groups when necessary.

Bankotsu snatched Jakotsu's wrist in mid-run. "Leave him alone, you ass. You can jump him in the men's room later. Don't you remember we have somewhere to be?"

Jakotsu stopped in his attempts to free himself and fell limp to the floor releasing a weak, "Hai," before slithering down the hallway towards Rm. 042.

Bankotsu pulled out a small business card and reread it's contents as he followed his downtrodden comrade.

**Flaming Duck cordially invites you to attend our seminar on the creation and distribution of fan fiction to the anime community. Attendance is mandatory.**

June 4th, 2004, 01:00 PM, Rm 042  
If you fail to show, a blonde trigger happy manic will appear at your doorstep.

"Mandatory, huh. What kind of bastards are these guys, forcing me to-" Bankotsu sighed as his eyes came to focus on the woman standing in front of him. Jakotsu had slowed to Bankotsu's side and waited for him to make a move as the woman eyed him suspiciously. "Why are you here, Kikyou?"

The raven-haired woman took a second to respond as she picked up her bow and arrows that were resting against the wall. "I'm here for a meeting."

Bankotsu and Jakotsu watched as she exited the hallway and entered a large lecture hall. Bankotsu's eyes narrowed as they fell on the room number. "You've gotta be shitting me."

"Yatta! Bankotsu, we're here!" Jakotsu seemed to be regaining his usual cheery demeanor.

"I can read." Bankotsu sighed yet again. "Let's go."

The door, which had slipped shut moments before, creaked open yet again, and as the interior of the room came into view Jakotsu's eyes turned to mush. There, standing in the middle of the room, was InuYasha. He was in a fervent conversation with Kagome, while a small kitsune sitting on the nearest chair was listening intently to every word the pair said.

Jakotsu decided to be cautious about his approach this time, opting for a more reserved attack. They made they're way towards the front of the room and the desk that was laden with multiple papers and signs. Jakotsu tried to deviate from their path but Bankotsu grabbed his collar and dragged him to the table.

"Aho! Would you please, behave yourself, god, every freaking time. Why the hell do I hang out with you? It's beyond me. Am I on a masochistic streak or something? I don't know…" Bankotsu continued to mumble his insults into his hand that was wrapped around his face in a thoughtful way.

Jakotsu, seeing the tension and anger flowing out of his friends' slumped form, put on a sappy frown and leaned in front of Bankotsu's face. "What's wrong, Bankotsu. You're unusually touchy today." When Bankotsu didn't respond Jakotsu reached for his shoulders. He thought a good backrub was in order…perhaps that wasn't the best idea.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, baka!" Bankotsu pulled away. "I told you before, I'm not into that."

He instantly regretted shouting at his friend when Jakotsu's happy demeanor disappeared yet again to reveal a depressing sight. "Damn it, it's not your fault alright? I just have a really bad feeling about this place, like something bad is going to happen."

"Bankotsu-sama?" A young woman cut into the conversation.

"Hai."

She smiled brightly at the young man. "Here's your nametag. And I assume you're Jakotsu-sama?"

After earning a nod from Jakotsu she handed them their nametags.

"You two should find your seats as soon as possible. It's about to get packed in here." As they walked off she added, "I'm Ayaka, if you need anything!"

"What a stunning way to introduce yourself," Tashi said to her co-worker, earning a glare from Ayaka. She then proceeded to mock said girl. "It's about to get packed in here. I'm Ayaka, if you need anything."

"Shut-up will you!" Ayaka threw a nametag in Tashi's face. "If you're so perfect, you give that one to its owner when he comes in."

Tashi stared at the nametag in her hand. Sesshoumaru.'

As if on cue, Sesshoumaru approached the table glaring at the cutesy sign that said Pick up your nametags here.' His gaze slowly rose to look at the girl stuttering his name.

"Se…sess…" Tashi couldn't seem to form one word, let alone a name with four syllables.

"Ah, Sesshoumaru, ne?" Ayaka tried to cover for her slightly embarrassed friend and nudged Tashi to say something.

"Aa," was Sesshoumaru's reply as he watched Tashi tremble.

As if to lighten the mood, Ayaka ventured to continue the conversation. "Shall we call you Sessy-kun?" She giggled at the stupidness of her comment but moments later regretted even uttering the words. Sesshoumaru turned to glare at her for a second before turning back to Tashi.

"My name is Sesshoumaru...-sama may be added, no letters may be removed." He said it in an almost casual manner, if a latent threat could be called casual.'

"Hai, Sesshoumaru-dono," Tashi bowed and handed the nametag to the tall youkai.

He raised an eyebrow as if her wording choice was of interest. "Acceptable."

He gracefully turned and chose the closest set of three chairs and waited patiently for his companions to sit at his side.

"Konichiwa!"

Tashi smiled down at the little girl in her orange kimono. "Konichawa! Here you go Rin-chan. Aren't you just adorable in that outfit. Did Sesshoumaru-dono buy that for you?"

"Hai!"

"That's awfully nice of him."

"Hai, Sesshoumaru-sama is the best."

"He just didn't want to be seen with a child in rags." Jaken mumbled as he took his nametag from Ayaka. "I don't get why he wants to have a child with him in the first place, a human child at that."

"I'm sure he has his reasons, Jaken-san." Ayaka replied.

"That's right. No one would just leave a helpless child. Sesshoumaru-dono did what he felt was best. And anyway, how could anyone resist that kawaii face?"

Tashi was on the point of making Ayaka roll her eyes, but she resisted the urge and nodded her head in agreement. It would be wrong to make Tashi angry on such a happy day. But when the woman opened her mouth again to ask a simple question, Ayaka raised a questioning brow.

"Jaken-sama, why are you green?"

It was a straight-forward question, a pretty stupid, straight-forward question.

"Did she put you up to this?" Jaken was talking about Rin.

"Of course not, Jaken-sama. I am completely serious. I've always wondered about coloration and the sort." Tashi innocently winked at Rin, who smiled back.

Jaken sighed, "I don't know, now leave me alone." The small toad waddled over to the seat next to Sesshoumaru and hopped up placing his two-headed staff under his chair. Why was he always bombarded with stupid questions that anyone with common sense wouldn't even utter…like right now.

"Jaken-sama, why do you get to sit next to Sesshoumaru-sama?" Rin tilted her head slightly. Sesshoumaru had strategically chosen a seat at the end of a row, perhaps as a way to secure a fast exit.

She was asking why _HE_ got to sit next to Sesshoumaru-sama? Why should she be allowed to sit next to his master and not him? Jaken closed his eyes and recited his many reasons, many of which Rin had heard before.

"As Sesshoumaru-sama's traveling companion and soon to be minister of his Lands I have the privilege of sitting next to him. You wouldn't understand the significance, and one day too you may be able to-"

"Sesshoumaru-sama?"

Jaken's eyes flew open and turned sharply to the left. Rin had planted a chair from the row behind them on the other side of Sesshoumaru and was currently trying to climb up into the cushioned seat.

"Hm?" Sesshoumaru turned his gaze to the little girl and waited for her to settle herself.

"Can I sit here?"

"Aa."

Jaken slumped into his chair.

Many would consider this a truly adorable situation, which would elicit a sappy Aww' from the viewer, as it was doing to Tashi, but for Ayaka it was a different matter. Her hands clutched the table tightly turning her knuckles white, struggling with herself to maintain composure. Tashi, noticed this change in her friend.

"Ayaka-chan, are you ok?"

"What…is wrong with this picture?" She was staring intently at the three in front of her. Jaken and Rin were having a soft conversation across Sesshoumaru who was surveying the area.

"Nothing, Ayaka-ch-"

"No, everything is wrong with this picture. She has moved a chair. It's not symmetrical anymore. The chair is gone, it's not there. The row is lacking. It is lonely. It is different from all the others. It needs stability. It needs reassurance that the other rows won't laugh at it. It needs that extra chair, and SHE took it! It's not her's to take. That chair belongs to that row. She took a piece of its soul. She has no concern for its soul!"

Ayaka collapsed into the chair behind her and began lovingly stroking its metal back.

"Ummm, well, we could just add an extra chair to each row."

"No!" Ayaka was standing, resolute at what had to be done, "That would create an imbalance. The aisle would be restricted from breathing. No one would be able to walk in peace without running into the chairs causing pain and panic to inflict the poor souls. It's a safety issue and an issue of right and wrong."

"Okay, Okay." Tashi attempted to calm her friend.

"Make her fix it. Make her restore the balance. Balance is needed. It is required. Make her fix it." It wasn't a request. Tashi knew this. With the way Ayake had said it, it was definitely a demand, almost a threat; that strained smile revealing all.

To move Sesshoumaru was out of the question. Sesshoumaru was a god, well a demon lord, but that was close enough to the same thing in Tashi's mind, and she couldn't just ask the gorgeous lord to move. He would never do such a thing and should never be required to do so. The only course of action that seemed obvious enough to her and would make the now-maddened Ayaka calm, was one that would make a certain toad very unhappy.

"Jaken-sama?" Tashi approached the toad carefully; he was still conversing with Rin when she spoke again. "Jaken-sama?"

"Yes, what is it?" he snapped. Great, he was still in a bad mood. What could make this any worse?

"Um, is it possible that you could move down a seat so that Rin-chan can sit there?"

"Excuse me?"

"Well, it's just that, we can't have the aisles blocked. It's against hotel safety regulations."

"Why don't you just ask Rin to-"

"Jaken," Sesshoumaru's interruption silenced the toad.

"Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"Move."

"But…"

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed and repeated his previous statement. "Move."

Jaken bowed his head, apologizing for his rudeness, and relinquished his chair to the waiting girl. Tashi bowed multiple times, bringing her head down to her waist, as Rin took her new seat.

"Thank you, Jaken-sama. Thank you, Sesshoumaru-dono. Thank you so much."

After pulling her head up from her eighth bow she noticed the chair in the row had miraculously returned to its former position and Ayaka was beaming at it as she handed a nametag to a waiting hand, which promptly dropped it and turned to smack the person behind it.

"How many times do I have to tell you?"

The houshi raised both of his arms in a defensive position. "Not in public, I know, I know."

The young taijiya turned and reached to pick up her nametag on the ground. The houshi's eyes quickly reverted from the cute innocent expression to his old perverted self as he gazed at the woman in perfect position in front of him. The opportunity couldn't be wasted. He stretched out his flexing hand, preparing for contact, only to be met with another smack to the face.

"Sango! I didn't even touch you!"

"But you were thinking about it!"

"There is no crime in that!"

Hating to break up the fight in front of her eyes, but Ayaka had no choice. "Umo…"

"WHAT?" the couple snapped in unison.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but you're holding up the line and we have to start soon."

Miroku and Sango looked to see a very bored Naraku, Kanna, and Kagura standing in wait behind them. After apologizing, Miroku took his nametag and they took seats next to InuYasha, Kagome and Shippo. Naraku took his nametag in silence as Ayaka and Tashi made new ones for the two sisters. It wasn't expected that Naraku would bring any of his detatchments. Kouga and Ayame entered not too long after.

As Naraku, Kanna and Kagura examined the room, Tashi called for everyone's attention. "Alright, could everyone please take your seats? We'll begin shortly."

InuYasha sat next to Kagome and had tried to convince Shippo to sit on his other side, but Kikyou moved too fast and was already there before Shippo could make the leap from Kagome's lap. Sango sat to the other side of Kagome and Miroku sat next to her. Naraku and his daughters (I wrote that and it was weird) took their seats in the back row by Bankotsu and Jakotsu. Kouga and Ayame were in the front near Jaken.

A tall blond American pulled the doors closed and leaned nonchalantly against the wall, one finger casually pushing his black sunglasses up the bridge of his nose. His other hand straightened the bottom of his long white dress shirt and took its place in the pocket of his black slacks as he nodded that the room was secure.

Ayaka and Tashi both smiled at the man and took their places. Ayaka poured two glasses of water from a large pitcher while Tashi began.

"Alright, everything appears in order, so we will now begin. We'd like to welcome you all to our discussion and hope you will find it informative and enlightening today." She cleared her throat and took a small sip from the glass Ayaka handed her and then pulled out a small pink bunny from her briefcase. "First off, we'd like you all to introduce yourselves. We're sure that the majority of you have met each other in one way or another but it is customary at these sorts of things to state who you are and get to know each other better. This is Kumagoro." She pointed at the bunny.

"Hey, InuYasha that looks like-"

"Shut it, Miroku." InuYasha spat through clenched teeth as he stared at the floppy eared toy.

"Ryu-chan." Sesshoumaru finished Miroku's thought. "This is pointless."

"Ryu-chan?" Kagome's eyes lightened. "You mean that bunny from before?"

Everyone chuckled from the memory as Rin sat confused.

"Sesshoumaru-sama, who is Ryu-chan?"

"You wouldn't know," was his reply as Tashi continued

"We will now pass around Kumagoro to everyone and they have to introduce themselves. We'll start at the front and work our way to the back." She handed the rabbit to Sesshoumaru.

"Sesshoumaru." He passed the creature to Rin, refusing to utter another word while holding the object.

"I'm Rin."

"Jaken."

"Kouga."

"Ayame." She reached behind to Miroku and tossed the bunny in his direction.

"Miroku."

"Sango."

"He's so cute." Kagome was fiddling with Kumagoro's ears. Shippo pulled him from Kagome's grasp, stated his name, and tried to pawn the bunny off on InuYasha, who refused to touch the toy.

"I'm not holding that." He crossed his arms and waited for Shippo to toss it to Kikyou, but instead of that, Shippo threw it into Inuyasha's arms and, reflexively he batted the toy away. Before it could reach the tiled floor, however, it was scooped up by the tall American who promptly pulled his Glock out of the back of his pants and placed the barrel directly between two large golden eyes.

"Apologize to the bunny."

"Um, wha-"

"I said," the trigger inched back slowly accentuating each click with a word, "apologize to the bunny."

"It's just a-"

"APOLOGIZE!"

"I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY!" He snatched Kumagoro from the man's hands, quickly stated his name, and passed the rabbit off, never taking his eyes off the man slowly returning his gun to its previous location.

"Thank you, Mr. K," Ayaka bowed to the man in appreciation.

"No problem," he said in a thick American accent. "That guy always has issues with the bunny."

"So I guess we know who the trigger happy manic on the business card is, huh?"

Bankotsu smirked.

Jakotsu took the toy away from InuYasha with greedy hands, completely disregarding the fact that Kikyou was next and winked at the blonde. "If I threw away Kumagoro-chan would I be punished?"

K shuddered at the way the man was looking at him and then Kumagoro.

"Shit, Jakotsu, keep your crazy fetishes to yourself." Bankotsu didn't bother to grab the toy from Jakotsu and shouted, a little louder than was necessary, "Yo, Bankotsu here."

"What about me?" Kikyou stood up, obviously irritated at being left out.

"What about you?" Bankotsu chided, "You're not important."

"I am important! I'm Kikyou!"

"That's nice, nobody cares."

"Oh, and, I am Jakotsu." He casually waved. After a few nudges from Bankotsu, Jakotsu finally delivered Kumagoro to the small girl next to him

"I'm Kanna."

"Kagura"

"Naraku."

"Okay, it's great to have you all here." Akaya chirped.

"What am I supposed to do with this…thing?" Naraku held Kumagoro with his thumb and forefinger as if he was going to catch a disease from the furry creature.

"K-san, if you could," Tashi asked in a somewhat forceful tone that caused a few in the room to turn her way.

K took Kumagoro and once he was sitting comfortably on top of the front desk by Ayaka, Tashi spoke again.

"As Ayaka was saying, it is great to have you all here. This discussion panel was set up for you to ask all of your questions regarding the fan fiction community and fan fiction itself."

"Wait, wait," Kouga interrupted. "You sent us these little cards demanding we show up, and then you tell us that this is just a lame discussion in which we do all the talking?"

"No, not necessarily. We are here to answer any questions you may have. We understand we may have sounded a little pushy in our invitations, but it's only best if all of you show up. We knew a few of you would find it more important to continue your daily rituals of hunting youkai, meandering across the landscape looking busy, and asexually reproducing. What fun is there in that every single day? We thought it would be good to try and get you more involved in the world beyond the Shikon no Tama, the world of fan fiction. Now, how many of you have actually read the fiction written about your lives?" Tashi asked for a raise of hands, "Don't be shy, I know for a fact most of you have read some."

The hands slowly began to touch the crisp air of the room. It was of no surprise to Tashi or Ayaka that everyone had read at least one of the fics about the group. It did surprise others though.

"Holy shit!" InuYasha blurted, causing Kagome to jump and glare in his direction. He seemed unfazed by the gaze though. His eyes were on someone else.

"Sesshoumaru!"

Sesshoumaru quickly lowered his half-raised half before anyone else could notice. He sighed and twisted to face his half-brother. "What?"

"You, you had your hand raised, you pansy-ass!"

"I was merely stretching. Mind your own business." With that said Sesshoumaru sat back in his chair again. "I had assumed you had something intelligent to say to me. Though, I do realize now, it was wrong to expect the impossible."

InuYasha gritted his teeth and stood up reaching for Tessaiga.

"Osuwari," Kagome sighed as InuYasha's head hit Jaken's chair and then the waiting floor. Every time, he was truly an easy target.

"Why the hell did you-"

"Shut-up, InuYasha. Try to act a little more civilized, would you?"

InuYasha's ears fell at her statement. Did she really see him as uncivilized? No, that wasn't right. She was just upset. That's all.

"It's okay, InuYasha, I would never call you uncivilized." Kikyou took his hand and pulled him to his seat beside her.

InuYasha noticed the obvious sadness in Kagome's eyes and pulled his hand back into his lap with such force that he rammed into Kagome, causing Kouga to jump up.

"See how violent he can be. That's why Kagome should be sitting here with me! She is my woman!"

"I'm your only woman, damn it!" Ayame screamed.

"If that's true, then shouldn't Kikyou be sitting next to me?" Naraku replied to Kouga, completely ignoring Ayame's outburst.

"Oh, but then, sweetie, you should be sitting next to me." Jakotsu draped his long arms around Naraku's form causing the hanyou to tremble in fear.

He forcefully removed the dead psychotic mercenary from his body and attempted to scoot his chair into the aisle only to find Mr. K holding it firmly in place with his boot. He swore he heard whispered thank you's from the front of the room.

"Would you kindly remove your foot?" Naraku hissed at the blonde.

Mr. K once again pulled his Glock out and replied in a sing-song voice, "No."

Jakotsu returned to his place around Naraku's shoulders and extended one hand out to touch K's gun.

"I do like your gun, K-san."

K used his free hand to remove another gun from it's place in his boot that was still holding Naraku's chair in check, and aimed that one at Jakotsu, earning a short semi-erotic gasp from the man.

"I've dealt with your kind before, granted you are more open than most of the one's I've met in Japan, I know how to deal with your type."

"Oh, then please deal with me any way you'd like." Jakotsu continued to flirt with the man, seemingly unfazed at the fact there was a gun in his face.

"Get off of me." Naraku chimed in, trying to reclaim his freedom.

Jakotsu turned his attention back to taunting the hanyou. "Oh, you remember don't you? About that one night…"

"I do not recollect such a thing, therefore it never existed."

"If you recall, I DO have the pictures to refute that statement." Bankotsu smiled.

"It's a shame you really can't remember," Jakotsu pouted in his ear. "You loved me like this…from behind."

A shudder ran through the occupants of the room and InuYasha laughed at his older brother. "Dude, you just, like, trembled in fear."

"This Sesshoumaru does not tremble, in fear or in any other emotion."

"Well, I don't know about that. You were trembling pretty heartily after class the other day."

Jaken found his way to the floor as Tashi shoved him out of her way and pointed an evil finger in InuYasha's face.

"That Sesshoumaru does not TREMBLE! I did not see trembling. If there is no visible trembling there is no trembling and since it wasn't apparent, there was no trembling, _hence_ he did not tremble. He never trembles. There may be a twitch here and there occasionally, in a bad situation, perhaps some red eye action, but no TREMBLING! Do you want me to bring out Kumagoro again, huh? Want me to talk about your little midnight excursions with Ryu-chan, huh? HUH?"

Tashi continued her ranting as Ayaka dragged her by her firm collar back to the front of the room.

"Hai, Hai, there was no trembling, now calm yourself before you have an embolism."

"But, but, he said the T' word. That's not permissible in my presence. That's not fair and it is wrong. He would never do such a thing. Trembling is not the right wording, trembling didn't happen! That's like saying Bankotsu's gay!"

The familiar sound of flesh meeting flesh resounded through the room; however Miroku and Sango were sitting in amazement at the woman who had just slapped her companion. Tashi was shocked into silence as she rubbed at her sore cheek.

"Never say that in my presence again! EVER!"

The only thing that could be heard was Bankotsu swallowing deeply as he wondered exactly what the woman's intentions were.

"See! That's exactly like them saying Sesshoumaru was trembling!"

"But, that's going too-"

BANG!

The petty squabbling of the two women ceased as Mr. K finally released his aggression, which had been slowly building throughout the morning.

"He actually just fired his weapon," Ayame whispered to a now rigid Kouga.

Ayaka and Tashi stared at the hole in the drywall behind them. And then, after straightening their clothes, they bowed at Mr. K.

"Arigato, Mr. K." The women stated in unison. Upon returning their attention to the audiences, their faces held an unfamiliar, yet cheerful disposition as if nothing had transpired between the fueding hosts. Inuyasha fiddled with his fingers mumbling something about Ryu-chan and a sudden stillness filled the room.

"Alright!" Ayaka cut through the silence with a bright energetic voice. "Let's get this thing started. From the raise of hands this ought to be an interesting discussion. Who has the first question?"

Jakotsu raised his hand.

"Yes, Jakotsu?"

"Who are you?"

"Us?"

"Yes, I mean, you had us introduce ourselves and everything, but you practically dragged us here. Who are you guys?"

Jakotsu thought it was a straight-forward question. Who exactly were these people who knew exactly where to find them? Who knew their tendencies and mannerisms so well that they knew exactly how to threaten them all into attending?

The young women didn't see it as Jakotsu did and quickly took to conversing in almost whispered voices about what the proper answer would be. InuYasha's ears perked up, straining to make out any words, but only ending up with a few random thoughts.

"We could…no…but….the truth…not kill….but…sure, whatever…"

They came to a conclusion and returned to sitting properly at the desk. Tashi nodded and Ayaka prepared to give the answer. She lazily placed both of her hands behind her head, interlacing her fingers.

"Us? We're gods."

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Neechan #1 here.

Okay, so that was truly weird. Don't ask me how I came up with this weird-ass idea. It just showed up one night while I was trying to sleep. It's become rather…interesting to say the least. I really didn't intend for it to be so long. It was supposed to be a pointless one-shot, but damn, I just keep going.

I know the few people who actually read Seductive Snake's Shop of Secrets are going to be disappointed that I put this out before the next chapter of that. Gomenesai. I just can't seem to make headway on it and you know how if can be when one story just slaps you and says, "Hey, you, write me right now or I'll mock you forever." That's sort of how this was, plus I've been fighting off this evil viral thing. I wish I could just destroy it with my mind but alas, it won't listen. Damn diseases!

It gets very weird from here on in. Hopefully, it'll only be a few chapters long. We've got some pretty entertaining questions prepared for the group as well as some disturbing visuals. If that scares you, it's ok. I'm a little scared to read it myself, and I'm the one writing it. I guess you know you've got something when you even scare yourself.

Meh, whatever.

Characters and References to other Anime

K-san (aka Mr. K) and Kumagoro are from Gravitation by the great Maki Murakami. Oh and the reason we say K speaks with an American accent isn't the accent itself, but think of all the characters speaking in Japanese and then suddenly have K speak in English. That is how he does in Gravitation.

The reference to Ryu-chan is from our other story Demon Sex Ed' and is also a play on the fact that the Japanese voice actor who plays InuYasha also does the voice of the Kumagoro-toting lead singer Sakuma Ryuichi in Gravitation. (_Enter Neechan #2: That is the reason we love to play with combining Gravitation references with InuYasha.)_

Then there were lot's more references to DSE involving the Naraku/Jakotsu incident.

"Trembling in fear" Something we think is highly wrong. If you watch the InuYasha American DVD of episode 40-something…(oh man, I can't remember, maybe Neechan #2 will. _Neechan #2: Yes I do. Ep 45, Sesshoumaru wields Tokijin_) The subtitles have Sesshoumaru say regarding InuYasha: "To even make this Sesshoumaru tremble in fear" or something like that. Sesshoumaru doesn't tremble, he never will. And that's the last word on that subject. (_There was no trembling!)_

This may not seem like anything, and it is said in many different anime and stories, but when Ayaka says We're gods." I automatically think of Zenon from Saiyuki, he says it perfectly anytime anyone asks who they are.

I'm thinking of putting up a list of the suffixes and stuff on our profile so we don't have to tell what they are every time we use them. It gets a little annoying having to write it over and over, and I'm sure you all know how to access an author's profile.

Ok, so I missed a few of the references probably and I didn't do the translations, don't worry, Neechan #2 will be editing this tomorrow and fixing the mistakes and adding to the long ass end message. WOOHOO!!!! It's 3:26 AM, ladies and gentlemen. Time to fondle Saiyuki men in my dreams, sayonara.


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